I could not think of a better title. I know, sounds so awkward but it’s really all I could come up with to validate the time spent not blogging.
Been on holiday, still on holiday, I’ve never really understood 3 month bordering on 4 months holidays. I am pretty sure we don’t work that hard in varsity to warrant such a long break.
Anyways before I get carried away with petty things, this holiday has been quiet the interesting one. I got baptised (yeaaay!!), on the 15th of December 2013; friend’s dad passed away; friendships lost; dad collapsed; went to KZN (fun!!), got major sun burn… all in all… its been an interesting drama filled holiday and its not even done yet.
One thing I wanted to draw on though was the time I spent with my family yesterday and the lessons that came from it. All it took was one question from my grandmother and it all went downhill from there. She asked if I had been confirmed, I said no, but I got baptised. Picture a volcanic eruption, yep that’s what happened. All the mouths in that room erupted and no one could hear above the loud explosion of words spewing out of a strange fire I’d like to call defense.
James 1:19 ”…let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger”
They felt I was attacking the Lutheran church, abandoning the family beliefs and getting lost somewhere I don’t know because I am young and taken by beautiful words a pastor preached to me. I felt attacked by these four grown women that have raised me in love. All useless emotions with no fruit to bear because none of us were hearing each other but all of us were hearing ourselves and put aside the one thing we should all be focusing on, the bible.
Ow but the power of words and how they can act like a sharp knife that stabs repeatedly. I mentioned the bible, I got a ”so you think we don’t know the bible, we all interpret it differently” and various other answers.
One thing that stopped me from talking any further was the realisation that I am far from knowing how to speak gently. I was not quick to hear and I certainly wasn’t slow to speak in the beginning and I evidently moved most of them to anger with what seemed like foolish talk.
Yesterday was a huge challenge for me, I felt like I had completely shamed God, made a mockery out of His word. His word and prayer… aaah the peace and joy I had last night, knowing i have been forgiven was amazing. Its such a precious gift we’ve been given to repent. I find that now it is easier to do things that are biblical and hopefully bring glory to God cause now everybody knows where I stand, though they may not fully understand it cause of my own doing, but its easier now…
Thank God for his mercy. Anything we try do on our own we will surely fail. When the focus is always to glorify God, its wonderful cause all the challenges that come, are counted all joy, and they strengthen us so much and we become steadfast and immovable because of the hope that we have….
Growing in grace…