Category Archives: Flesh v.s Spirit

That Time of the Month

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You sit, you stand, you stretch, you walk, you’re not actually sure which position you should be in.

You’re hungry but you don’t want to eat cause you’re scared the food will greet you again in a few minutes looking a bit gooey.

You love everybody, your life is ending, why doesn’t anybody understand you, you laugh, you cry – all in a matter of 30 seconds.

*Side note: this is meant for ladies only, but testosterone is welcome too.

Joy, it’s that time of the month. Some women can relate and some just don’t get it. When I was in primary school around 11-12 years of age, I just wanted to start my period, it felt like every other girl was on their period except me. I complained to my mother so many times asking her why I haven’t started my periods, as if she could jump-start them or something, and she’d tell me I’m still young. I wanted to buy pads and complain about period pains too.

Out of the blue on December the 24th, visiting in a rural part of Zimbabwe, I say to my mom, “there’s blood”, I was so happy! This was like a Christmas gift from heaven, it’s just awkward that my first pad was wrapped up tissue and cotton wool, but I didn’t care, I felt grown!

I started my period when I was 13 years old, I had no period pains at all for the first few years, until 2009 when I was 19. Out of nowhere I had cramps going from my lower abdomen to my back and I was like, who are you and where do you come from?! From that year I understood what period pains are and why people would skip school because of them. Those things are PAINFUL.

I get nausea,  headaches, cramps etc, and I sometimes go through the weirdest emotions, I’ll cry cause of an advert, get angry cause the water wasn’t coming out right in the shower, be happy because it’s a beautiful day outside and expect everybody to understand me. It’s a bit mental really.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
 In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths. – Prov 3:5-6 [ESV]

At that time I feel like it is the most normal thing, like why is the water not coming out properly, what is wrong with this shower, who made this shower, what is wrong with the world?! It escalates pretty quickly and after that emotion dies down and I have time to reflect on it, I wonder how water got me so angry?

This is something I feel as ladies we should prepare ourselves for. If you know that like me, you go through periods of unstable emotions, make ways to ensure as minimal damage as possible. It is during these times that you are prone to complain, nag, and just be that huge fly that doesn’t wanna get out the kitchen.

Do not lean on your own understanding – You may feel like it is perfectly reasonable to get angry and shout at your friend because she brought you grape flavoured gum instead of berry flavoured gum. Firstly, you need to understand that this is a temporary emotion, it will be gone in a few seconds, minutes or even hours. It is not wise to act on temporary emotions such as anger because you could say things you do not mean and hurt the person it is directed to. You could overreact and give undue punishment for something really small and many other things you may regret later on.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart – When emotions are running high – STOP. The temptation at this point is sky-high, everything in you will justify wrong actions to fulfill whatever desire you have in your heart. Say no and choose to trust in the Lord.

But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. – James 1:14-15 [ESV]

Yesterday night I just wanted to have a nice hot shower before going to bed, I go to the bathroom, leave the water on so it can get hot while preparing my stuff, a minute later I check on the water and it is ice-cold. I was so ready to go to my mom and shout at her for switching off the geyser, I was angry. Thank the Lord I remembered to just stop, calm down and think. I wanted to take a hot shower, nothing wrong with that, I wanted to take a hot shower NOW, something wrong with that. I felt I had the right to be angry, maybe nothing wrong with that, I felt like I could act any way I wanted because I was on my period and therefore she must understand, something wrong with that.

In the heat of the moment I was just thinking about now, after I stopped and thought, I could reason and think to go switch the geyser on and wait about an hour for the water to heat up. I wanted to shout at my mom cause she switched the geyser off, forgetting that she does that to save electricity which benefits us and Eskom – hopefully there’ll be less load shedding :’). The consequences of acting on that anger could have been anything from an uncessary fight to a killing of character.

Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger,  and give no opportunity to the devil. – Eph 4:26-27 [ESV]

Honestly, that time of the month is perfect conditions for the devil to reside. You feel justified in your actions because you’re hormonal – stop and leant not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge the Lord. The Lord created us, He knows what we go through, He does not tempt us but He does equip us with a way of escape (1 Cor 10:13). TRUST HIM in those exact moments. Choose rather to obey Him which is usually the harder option, than to give into your desires.

There is nothing wrong with emotions, they allow us to be joyful with others, be sad with others and many other wonderful things, but don’t act on your emotions impulsively and justify it by that time of the month. Let it rather be a time to give thanks to the Lord for the gifts of self-control and the opportunity to turn to Him multiple times in one day asking for wisdom and calmness. You’ll neeed that prayer sister.

I’ll be working on that too…


Between the 25th of November and 16th of December it will be 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children here in South Africa. It is an international campaign though, so I thought I should take that time to post on abuse, physical and sexual, the statistics; share maybe one or two stories and possible ways we could deal with it as Christians.

If you would like to share your story or have any questions you would like me to address please don’t hesitate to contact me and state whether you would like to remain anonymous or not. I don’t have all the answers but I will do as much praying and research as I possibly can to make sure that post is helpful.

You can email me on: sola5er@yahoo.com

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Exposed

exposed

“Father, thank you for allowing me the privilege to come before you, a holy God, with my petitions. Thank you flooor bu–nny egg bake – *snore* you’re so good and beautiful catterpi-created you all-er” … Aaaand I’m waking up the next day.

Those nights I’m like “no sleep formed against me shall prosper” *getting into bed, “I will pray!” Are the very nights that sleep overpowers and conquers me so bad I wake up the next morning saying “amen” thinking I just finished praying.

“Holy, holy, holy is the LORD of hosts; the whole earth is full of his glory!”…”Woe is me! For I am lost; for I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the LORD of hosts!” – Isaiah 6:1-5

It’s days like these that cause me to question whether I really understand what is meant by God is holy. Isaiah is there crying woe is me; creatures say holy holy holy, day and night; the Seraphim covered his feet and face; and there is me, falling asleep.

Naturally I tell a friend or someone about what happened because I feel bad, and I get things like, at least you slept in prayer, some people don’t pray. But Aha! That’s the problem. “I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips”, I measure myself against the wrong scale.

When you fail a test at school,you don’t look for the person with the highest mark to boast about your failure because it doesn’t feel nice to be exposed on things you’ve failed to accomplish. But that’s exactly what we need  in our lives, to be exposed to God’s holiness, perfection, that we may see just how dismally we fail.

 Compared to other people we may seem alright, in fact we may even earn titles, ‘the girl with the prayer book’, ‘the guy who hides verses in his pockets’, but compared to God, sha, a drop of water in the ocean, we just don’t compare.

So what’s the fuss about sleeping while praying? It shows a lack of reverence, respect or appreciation. We sleep because we’re tired, we normally get tired after hours of being awake. I know that by 9pm my mind starts shutting down, if I try and read anything, I will fall asleep. The disciples fell asleep when they were supposed to be praying as well (Matthew 26:41-43), they were tired shem, “the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak”.

I can’t imagine someone getting to work to sleep, besides getting fired, people would ask why they don’t sleep enough at home. We’re taught to take our jobs and schooling seriously, we should take the LORD even more seriously. Instead of choosing times when we know we’re incapable of praying or reading God’s word, rather choose times where you are fully alert if you decide to wake up in the morning and not tired if you decide to do it in the evening.

“But we pray to God that you may not do wrong—not that we may appear to have met the test, but that you may do what is right, though we may seem to have failed” – 2 Corinthians 13:7

We have great need to be in prayer, we’re always ready to sin and without God’s word we could never know what He finds as sin, and we could lead ourselves blindly thinking we are going in the right path simply because we are using the wrong measuring scale.

“…Yet if it had not been for the law, I would not have known sin. For I would not have known what it is to covet if the law had not said, “You shall not covet.” – Romans 7:7

Praise the LORD for His word, which teaches us and prepares us for all that we need to glorify Him and grow in His grace through His son Jesus Christ. Even though it’s tough to fight against our own flesh, yield to Christ and cry out to Him, He will strengthen you.